Is there something particularly special about raising a little girl? Something that can’t quite be put into words? Do they have an ability to find a place in a father’s heart that no one else can? There are days when I feel like I’ve gotten off easy; I have two boys. But, there are other days when I wonder, am I missing out on something?
My prayer is that First Baptist will be a place where the hearts of fathers are turned to their children, and the hearts of children to their fathers. I pray that an intentional evening shared between fathers and their daughters will see God glorified, the Church edified, and families sanctified. Fathers, I’m praying for you as you work to build strong families and raise children who adore God and fear the Lord. I’m praying for you–praying you will be godly, praying you will fight for holiness, praying you will lead your families well.
Fathers : The LORD our God, the LORD is one. You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.” – Deuteronomy 6:4-9
… and when you go on dates with your daughters.
Pastor for Children and Family Ministry
Planning a Date With My Daughter?
Let us help…
Who: Is there a point at which fathers cease being fathers? Do daughters reach some unspoken age at which point they are no longer daughters? Certainly not! Daddy-daughter date night is not an age graded event. Plan to attend this event regardless of age. Also, father-in-laws, take your daughter-in laws out if their father is not around.
When: On Thursday evening, November 11, First Baptist Church will be hosting a “Daddy-Daughter Date Night.” If you have a daughter of any age, please plan to attend this event.
Where: We will meet together at First Baptist Church in the Great Room
What time: A corporate gathering will begin at 6:00. This time will be dedicated to prayer and worship. At 6:20 we will disperse, filling Paducah’s restaurants and parks with fathers loving on their daughters.
How: Brenda McElroy, Director of Women’s Ministry at First Baptist, has been gracious enough to provide fathers with the following lists of suggested activities, conversation helps, and a chivalry review. Please take advantage of her wisdom.
- Take a walk in a well-lighted neighborhood, collect leaves, count the stars, and look for the Big Dipper. Follow it up with a visit to “Sonic” for their favorite ice cream treat.
- Enjoy a hamburger together at her favorite spot (yes, even if it’s McDonald’s); then Christmas shop for mom together.
- Share a brick oven baked pizza at “Max’s” (122 Market Street; suggest reservations at 575-3473) followed by a walk along the riverfront.
- Pick up her favorite dessert at “Upper Crust” (2602 Jackson Street – open until 6 pm). Surprise her with a flower in the car and then enjoy dessert at the riverfront.
- Enjoy a game of bowling at “Cardinal Lanes” ($3.75/person/game plus $3 shoes) followed by a stop at “Dairy Queen.”
- Enjoy looking through books together at “Books-a-Million.” Choose one to read together. End with hot tea/coffee at “Joe Muggs.”
- “Tell me about your friends or the girls at school/church. Who is your best friend? What do you like about her? What is the most important thing about being a friend?”
- “Tell me about your day. What was the best thing about today? If you could do anything you wanted tomorrow, what would it be?”
- “What do you want to be when you grow up? What are your dreams?”
- “What are the things you are most thankful for? What is Thanksgiving all about? What is Christmas all about?”
- Tell her about all the things that make her special to you. Tell her the story of her arrival and how that changed your world.
- Ask her what she looks for in a young man to date or to marry.
- Share a scripture that is special to you and why. Ask her to do the same.
- Ask her what God is teaching her right now. Think on your daughter’s relationship with the Lord and be willing to discuss the Gospel.
- This is your opportunity to make your daughter feel special and set the standard for how a date should treat her (now or in the future).
- Be sure to officially ask your daughter for this date personally or with a written note!
- Don’t miss an opportunity to open her car-door or any door for that matter!
- Whether you are ordering hot chocolate or a four-course meal, discuss the menu together and then order for her.
- An element of surprise always makes a girl feel special-whether it’s a flower on the seat of her car when you leave for your date, taking her to a place she’s never been, or presenting that favorite dessert at the riverfront.
Why is it important for fathers to take their daughters on dates?
Daddy-Daughter Date Nights create opportunity… opportunity for quality time, opportunity to demonstrate fatherly love, opportunity to make your daughters feel special, opportunity to give mom a break, opportunity to show your daughters how a man should treat a woman. Daddy-daughter dates create great opportunities. I believe chief among them is the opportunity to teach your daughters theology. Does this last opportunity catch you off guard? Teaching theology probably isn’t the first thing that comes to mind when you’re hanging out with your five-year-old daughter; however, it’s an opportunity you can’t afford to miss.
Susan Hunt in her essay, How to Raise Feminine Daughters, suggests, “Our daughters will be products of their theology. Their knowledge–or lack of knowledge–of who God is and what He has done for them will show up in every attitude, action, and relationship. Their worldview will be determined by their belief system.”1 We must teach our daughters to worship God. Our daughter’s highest calling is to chase hard after the glory of God and to enjoy Him forever. God is the chief end of man; He is our purpose and His word is our authority. The Bible teaches us how to pursue the glory of God in Jesus Christ. Will we open up the pages of Scripture and tell our daughters of the glory of God? The world is working hard to break down any distinctions between male and female. The secular agenda is “sameness.” Is this biblical? Did God create man and woman to function identically?
In order to understand biblical manhood and womanhood we must know the triune God of the Bible. Each person of the Godhead is equal in value and essence, but distinct in role; that is, they function differently. God the Father serves a different role than God the Son; God the Son functions differently than God the Spirit, and God the Spirit serves a different role than God the Father. There is equality in the Godhead, each person of the trinity being equally valuable; however, the persons clearly function differently (1 Peter 1:2). Man and woman are created in the image of God and, like the triune God, are equal in essence and value but function differently in role (Genesis 2). “Sameness” is not a part of the biblical agenda and God is most glorified when our daughters embrace their femininity and pursue God’s design.
Hunt goes on to state, “we must teach our daughters that their value and identity lie in the fact that they are image-bearers of the God of glory.”2 Doing this will protect our daughters from seeking approval in the ways of the world. If we do not help our daughters tie their identity to God, they will tie it to something else– feminism, hedonism, materialism, self-worship, or any number of other things that lead to destruction.
We must teach our daughters to view God’s glory as their chief end and to filter their decisions based upon that reality. Teaching them to ask questions like, “Was God glorified in the way I spoke to my teacher? Did I bring God glory when I reacted to my parents that way? Am I bringing glory to God by wearing this outfit? Will God be most glorified with this career path? Will the choice of this husband bring glory to God?” Fathers, we must act as resident theologians, teaching our daughters, and setting an example for them by making God-glorifying decisions. Daddy-daughter dates are a simple way for us to accomplish this. Fathers, intentional, one-on-one time with our daughters creates wonderful opportunities to pass on the glories of God to the next generation.3
Hunt, Susan. (2002). How to Raise Feminine Daughters. In D. Rainey (Ed.),
Building Strong Families (pp.
150). Wheaton, IL: Crossway Books